Kirk Read
November 17, 2008
Category: Relationships

Dear Kirk,

My boyfriend and I have been together for six months. He is 23 and I am 48. I’m a college professor and he works at Costco as a re-stocker. I make about three times what he makes. I often end up paying for dinners out and recently paid for a weekend vacation. I want him to finish college and get a better job but he hates school and doesn’t want to do it. We are talking about him moving in to my house, so I need to set some boundaries about money and don’t know where to start. 

Dear Sugar Free Daddy,

Money is powerful, powerful stuff. I think of it like an open flame – it can be harnessed to cook your meals and keep you warm, but it can also burn the shit out of you. Anxiety about money has derailed millions of relationships.

It sounds like you guys are just getting to know each other. You’re working with a number of potent differences: age, financial status, educational background and probably a bunch of others. Tread lightly and always keep in mind what brought you together in the first place.

This is sensitive turf and it requires an enormous amount of communication. My partner and I live together. We split our bills down the middle, even though he makes more money than I do. Because of my stubborn pride and my history as a sex worker, it’s important to me that we approach our finances...

Read more