When Did You Know?

April 23, 2013

As I've come to realize, once you have a type it's pretty hard to step outside of what you like. No matter how hard you try. I can pinpoint pretty significant instances when I realized that I liked hairy guys and then subsequently was attracted to older hairy guys. Both stem from my adolescence (one in my middle school gym class and the latter due to my hot as hell 8th grade Earth Science teacher) and proved to be pretty formative in shaping the rest of my gay adult life.

But I want to hear from you guys, when did you know you liked older or younger guys? Was it a specific person or experience that left a mark on you? Let's start a discussion on how our attractions (and ultimately types) are created in our lives.

Tags: bears, Younger, Older, Hairy, Type
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Post written by RobHeartsDH (View Author Profile)
About this author: Rob lives in Manhattan with his black pug Riley. When he’s not thinking about daddies, he enjoys writing, eating burritos, watching copious amounts of television, and thinking about his next meal.
View all posts by RobHeartsDH


I love him.....I want him top of me...he is hot and yum ...

I love him.....I want him top of me...he is hot and yum ...

Eroticism is relational not fixed. Intimacy is dissolution. I don’t have a type. Never did. I am attracted to a man’s energy, his juice, glow, flow. Something alchemical. It’s quite metaphysical to me, primal, carnal. And every time I left my box, the walls I had put up, mostly because of what something exterior told me, and I complied: I had more fun than ever. To me that’s freedom. Scares me so few gay men are like me, although those few are better lovers than the lot. If you’re not free – that’s another closet, and you’ve stunted your growth.

Good for you. As for myself, my dick doesn't lie. I get hard for fur, not for smooth. I don't know why. I have "stepped outside the box"' but it is just not as satisfying.

whilst i do have preferences, i tend to agree with you !

You're completely right. If you let yourself be controlled by a "type" or a specific set of sexual practices (like S&M), you are trapped in a stuck state of consciousness where you're re-enacting some prior pleasure or pain without being fully present in the moment. While I have certain things I like because of pleasant associations with past experiences, just like jnp6, my hottest experiences all were surprises that were nothing like anything I'd had before. And the cool part is, once you like something new, a whole new range of men are available to you!

Love hairy and younger, especially fit guys. I've been attracted to fur since I was a teen, and younger, naturally hairy guys are a huge turn on to me. Too many feel the need to shave it all off.... oh, HELL NO!! ;-)?

I remember being a LITTLE kid, as young as five, going to the beach or the swimming pool. I just could not, even then, take my eyes off of mature men, especially their chests. The formation of pectoral muscles, hairy nipples, and hairy chests just mesmerized me. I didn't even know what I wanted to do to these men, and I already had an inkling that what I was feeling couldn't/shouldn't be talked about. In the next 20 or so years, it did NOT go away. It got stronger and stronger. And then, almost magically, I learned that there were plenty of hot, hairy MEN who ENJOYED turning me on, who would gladly let me put my hands and mouth all over their bodies. From very early on, the sight of a nice man's chest could give me a boner. What's NOT to like about that?--except when boners are totally inapropriate--which is a LOT of the time. As far as the idea of anal intercourse, I ASSUMED that the receiving partner would have to be drunk or knocked out unconscious. I mean how/why? would anyone even SUBMIT to such treatment? It's BOUND to hurt!! Ah, the crazy preconceptions we have! Also, I wasn't the sissiest of young men, but I was hardly macho/manly, and it was such a thrill to learn that there were hot MANLY men who liked my sort of boyish self. OH JOY! when I found out they had ways I never imagined to PLEASE me--and what's more--they WANTED to. And now, for the last 45 years, I have been on the hairy chest smorgasbord of LIFE, enjoying things I thought would NEVER be possible in my life. How I wish I could go back and find little 6 or 7-year old me at the beach and be able to sit down and say "Kid, you have NO IDEA of the joys that lie ahead for you. You'll have MORE than your share!" You can guess that my life turned out pretty happy--right? Hairy chests were my "gateway drug" to hairy cocks and hairy asses. Since there is a GREAT supply here where I live in South Florida, I am one HAPPY ADDICT. And I always leave with this question: Whom has my fur-fetish and my homosexuality HURT? I seem to be surrounded by smiling faces, glad to have the opportunity to share Man-to-man LUST. Hallelujah! Everyone should be so lucky--and that's the world I am hoping and working for.

This is just up my alley of what type of man I'm into Big, rugged hairy Brute types and not worried if he's a little Fem but also masculine which I find HOT(pictured) but I find when I try to talk to these type of gentlemen they usally chat at first but it turns to I'm a little too short for their taste( have been told that)and also the color card comes into play sometimes, I can hold my own with Brute type men(Guys your loss) eventually I'll find that right man to feel safe in his arms to come home to and about always or when I've known, I was 13yrs old and always found men with beards or any type of facial hair eroctic, I was extremely turned on and was even worse if I seen or happen to catch a naked man in the gym

I remember two things: When I was five, I always wanted Colt Seavers to save me in a fictional Fall Guy episode. The other was Yentl...I must have had a crush on Avigdor (Mandy Patinkin). Back then, it felt like I liked him for no reason at all. I just couldn't pinpoint it, I wasn't very secual and didn't have a concept for homosexuality.

In my late years of high school, I stumbled upon the erotic art of furries, animals with human-like characteristics. They are the reason why i had started to pull away from my bisexuality and lean more towards the homosexual lifestyle. It was clear to me that although these sexy, furry creatures were not real, so i connected bears and otters of the human world to my interests. Since I always pictured myself at the receiving end, I looked in to older, hairy men to satisfy my cravings. A twisted way to form a preference, but that is my story :)

Lost my "gay virginity" at 12, so I guess I knew at age 12 in middle school.

my freshman year in HS gym teacher was a hot hairy very handsome Italian muscle butch type of guy........mmmmmmmmmmmmmm that may have been the key to my prefferance. He had a hot ass,chest and face.....woof!!

Sounds like my experience with Coach Cappellanti--another Italian bear. He was also the wrestling coach. I had to interview him for an article on wrestling for the school newspaper. He told me to come by after football practice was over. The locker room was deserted. He came out of the shower in all his furry glory, cock swinging, towel drying the hair on his head so I got to see everything. I think I trembled during the entire interview, but I wrote the story. I was 15 at the time.

First guy had a hairy chest and thick hairy thighs...makes me leak thinking of him

I think I was like nine when I fixated on some of my dads carpenter buddies. Most of them had a shaggy surfer style and thats always been my type. Race and age don't seem to factor if you have the hair and muscles.

Always liked my own age,whatever it happened to be, since about the age of 15 or so until literally the day of my 50th birthday. A twenty something picked me up and once I got a taste for the younger flesh I couldn't go back.

I was about 13 years old, I was late in my pubescent stages. The Internet was still fairly new. I was surfing what little porn content the web offered at the time and I came across a site that held a multitude of nude males. The one man that really caught my attention was Colt model Pete Kuzak. Every photo of him was better than the last. I loved his handsome face, his well built frame and the photos of his huge, furry body were more than worthy of a massive hard on.

I am from a big family, five brothers. I have always like older guys. Hairy more than anything else. I new when I was about 11years old. My 7 and 8th grades I liked my men teachers, they where older and from what I could tell hairy. I got to see my dad naked a time or two. Hairy and avg. size dick. Same with my older brothers. Me being older now (58) I like guys that are maybe 10 to 15 years younger or my age maybe just a little older. Hairy if I can fine one that is. I will tell you that being without a partner or Bf or a man in my life. The older I get the less it matters. Going more what there personally is like.

I knew I liked hairy men the first time I saw an old episode of magnum P.I. and saw tom selick's beautiful furry body not gonna lie I got a woody, LOL! That was when I knew I wanted a hairy guy and I started dating older men after a bad relationship with a guy my own age he used me and dropped me when he got what he wanted at the time I had a great job and made really good money since then I have gravitated to older more mature men not only for security but because they just do it for me I would definetly take a silver fox over a hound luck any day because there is no training involed

I am attracted to younger, smooth men, fit to muscular. I think this is from secret crushes I had on jocks in high school. At the time I wasn't out, not even to myself. And now that I am, I think I am reliving the young gay life that I denied myself. Don't get me wrong, I am not attracted to boys, or boyish looking men. I just can't say no to a handsome fit stud with an erection ; )

You aren't reliving anything.
You aren't attracted to younger, smooth, fit men now because you were attracted to them when you were in high school.
You are just attracted to the type that you have always been attracted to.

yeah that's the way I feel . I have always just been attracted to younger smooth , decent bodied men , fit , jocks , runners , abs , no abs , just smooth attractive guys . I was when i was 10 , and I am now at 45 , probably always will be , and sometimes I feel disappointed , because I wasn't aware that there are younger guys out there who like older men , at least I have always found it hard to believe . But I must be wrong . Hope I can find one .

My most vivid desiring attraction was to Clint Walker, hairy masculine built Cheyenne, when I was probably 7 years old. That attraction grew as I grew into a young man. My first sexual contact, just graduated from high school was my fantasy come true with a masculine hirsute older man who pickled me up as I wandered my hometown streets desperately wanting a connection. I was shocked at the experienced but continued to fantasize and as an adult I've had the great good fortune to have had and continue to have rich loving,sexually HOT relationships with some stellar men. Currently in a poly amorous relationship with two men (one for 19 years) who are dreams in every way and hot hairy chests to boot!! And I'm the older of our triptych! We play each other as Daddy's!!

Clint Walker was the masturbation fantasy for a LOT of us. One of the greatest early hairy chests. What a HUNK. I remember the shirtless wood-chopping scene from the movie "The Bear." (About GRIZZLIES, not hairy men). Of course, Sean Connery got a lot of attention from us Baby Boomers as well.

Who is the guy in the photo?

Great topic. When I was very young, I remember a movie starring Rod Taylor and feeling completely breathless when he took off his shirt and revealed a hairy, muscular chest. At the same time, my older brother was a big fan of a Western TV show called "Cheyenne." I thought it was boring until the star, Clint Walker, also took off his shirt. He wasn't just hairy and drop dead handsome but he was tall with an utterly amazing muscular body. I became a fan and noticed that many episodes included shirtless Clint. Which made me wonder: was the periodic beefcake designed to hide Clint's rather one-dimensional acting or were there other people like me who were riveted by his massive shouldars and defined biceps? Flash forward to 9th grade and general science class. Even though it was mid-September, we wore suits and ties with our school monogram on the jacket. Our teacher, Mr. Dittmar, was wearing a suit. He was tall, not particularly handsome but a college football star with a classic linebacker body. This was his first year as a teacher and I don't remember his lectures. But, on one very warm afternoon, we were doing experiments in the lab. Mr. Dittmar told us we could take off our jackets and he did the same. I was having trouble with my Bunsen burner and he came over to help me. He paused for a moment and rolled up his shirt sleeves and stood behind me. My hands were shaking as I tried to ignite the burner and looked down and saw that his muscular forearms were covered with dark blonde hair. I think it was simply the most beautiful thing I had ever seen. I was so embarassed that I wanted to run out of the lab. But I did notice that he smelled like Old Spice and sweat as he leaned close, lit the burner and then touched my shoulder and told me to continue the experiment. That single moment inspired numerous masturbatory fantasies over the years and profoundly affected the kind of man who would later arouse my desires. Thank you, Mr. D!

when I in class 3 my adult friend hold my penis, i like but not clear whatz next, it was clear when my cousin first time do intercourse.

I had my 1 experience in private school when I was in the it's showers I was washing myself and a guy teacher came walking in I think I was 14-15 and I saw him and he saw me getting hard washing myself , and then he was taking his cloths off to come into the shower he was hairy and tough looking and hung someone you would not wont to piss off if he liked you he was the type very pertecive cause he really liked me , the 1s time he saw me joining the school , and from that day on I knew I liked hairy guys , I guess you could say I was the school slut lol but then things change you see back in the 70 s you had to be careful on who you came out to, being from a small town they didn't understand gays and if you gave any indication you would get the crap kicked out of you,

When I was 2 years old my parents took me to see "The Jungle Book". The actor who played Baloo had a deep, sexy voice, and I really identified with Mowgli. That's when I knew I was attracted to older men. At that age, while I did not know exactly what I wanted to do with a man if I somehow got one, I had some ideas. Mostly I wanted to be naked with them, exploring their bodies.

There was something more, though, that spoke to me about the movie - the tender, caring, and very masculine aspect of the Daddy/son dynamic that we so rarely see in public. In the movie that dynamic showed up in the relationships Mowgli had with a couple of characters.

At the same time that I realized I wanted older men, I also somehow knew that it was not something I should talk about with others. I spent the next 19 years trying to reconcile who I knew I was with who I was expected to be.

I grew up very son-identified until I was about 32 when I met a handsome, sexy man who was 40 years my senior. I told him I wanted to fuck him deep and call him Daddy. His response was that he wanted me to fuck him deep, but he wanted to call *me* Daddy. I thought about it for about 2 seconds and discovered that I really *love* to Father mature sons.

It is so good to feel and share that strong, tender, caring, loving, and lustful intimacy that is inherent in the Daddy/son dynamic.

Thanks for starting this conversation.

I, too, have really enjoyed this topic. Interesting posts. So many of us grew up the same way--thinking we were the only ones who had those strange feelings. I remember when I got my bike and was allowed free rein to ride around our suburban neighborhood. In the spring and summer, if I heard the sound of a lawnmower, I would follow it, hoping that there would be a shirtless hairy-chested daddy pushing it. I was always so disappointed when it was just another kid like me. :-( Swimming pools and beaches were my favorite places.

It is funny that you mention lawnmowers. I still turn my head to check out who is pushing it when I hear one. It is weird how some behavior stuck with us even through the years.

The bearded men I saw at church gave me some inspiration... though I don't really have a type. From my perspective the wrapping paper is largely inconsequential....I have a preference for furry older men but there is some flexibility with that, It depends on the man's personality and attitude - those are the things that will attract my attention.


The first time I watched him wrestle on TV, I instantly knew that he was the type of man for me. I was about 13 and I remember just drooling and getting instantly hard as soon as he appeared on the screen. I used to love when he would walk into the ring with a Four Horsemen shirt on then peel it off of his chest. Then, he would wrestle just in the smallest shorts and boots. That affected me because I still go wild when I'm with a daddy and he walks into the bedroom wearing just boots. I knew I was gay before that but the sight of Arn Anderson wrestling was what cemented it for me.

I think that the first time I got "it" about hairy men was when I picked up a Syrian guy in the Laundromat. We went to his place and when he took off his clothes I was taken aback. He was covered from head to toe with dark curly hair. I reached out to touch him and I found the hair to be really soft. It was like fucking a cashmere sweater!

I always knew I had a thing for older guys, and I got confirmation after having the best sex I ever had with a 50 year old when I was 19. Similar experiences with guys in their late 30's/early 40's have been a lot better than any with guys close to my age...

I remember searching through my parents bedroom drawers when they were on a night out. I was about 7. I came across a porn magazine that they must have been using to spice up their sex lives. Inside was various pictures of couples having sex and posing. At the back page was pictures of a mr universe contest. I assume it was advertising supplements as it was not part of the porn section. I literally couldnt take my eyes off the huge muscle. I stared and stared, day after day for ages. Loved it. Was heart broken when the magazine eventually dissappeared. Now, i love bodybuilders, big stocky men.

I was 4 or 5 when my two cousins and I started playing good doctor (with cloths on) and bad doctor (cloths off). I quickly started to like bad doctor. I would get hard and it tickled to have them touch me. Some where around 7 or 8 my cousin Mike, would come over and we started masturbating. He had no hair on his body at all. We masterbated every day after school for almost a year. Then at about nine I was using jergin’s lotion to masturbate and I came for the first time. My legs,pubs, chest and pits were covered in hair at this time.He told me about seeing his step brother and a friend having sex. He was topping his friend, so Mike told me that if I would suck him he would let me put mine into his ass. God I loved it and that was what went on with him through High school. He loved to get sucked off and in those days I could fuck and suck at the same time. What a child hood!
That set a strong desire to be with a smooth bottom. That has never changed. I have tried the bear, but it is not the same for me. I love my hairy body and to have a smooth man lick me all over But when I do it to them the fewer hairs the better..

I knew I liked older guys when I started dating guys my age and they couldn't hold a conversation. Older men can do that. The worst date I ever went on was with a guy my age and he couldn't even talk. Some how we get on the subject of Ice Cream. Yes! Ice cream! And He says. "I like chococlate strawberry and vanilla but I don't like neopolitan." Yes, I know! Older men just seem to have it and get it. There is something about a fit, young looking well dressed middle aged man that is ssssssoooooo sexy. Daniel Craig and Hugh Jackman. WOW! Don't even get me started on Anderson Cooper. I have always been attracted to older guys, even in high school. My soccer coach, personal trainer, boss just to name a few. but i think i mostly knew with my high school history teacher He was a football coach and he lifted weights. I just knew that older guys were for me. I think for me it is because they look like men not boys. But sometimes I find it a little hard to date older men cause of the age difference but I will still try. Any takers?

I have always known as a 5 Yr old child that I was liking & wanting a Big Hairy Hunk of an older Man. Now it is funny that I now have a Hairy Man -N my life but for the 1st time -N my life he is not older.

Huh... most of you guys go for the older hairy type. I guess I have to appreciate that. But, I've always loved the young guys. Even when I was younger than them. One example I cleary remember was being completely in love with Atreyu (Noah Hathaway) from Never Ending Story. He's about 4 years older than me. And I was around 9 or 10 when the movie came out. Around that same time I clearly remember one of the sons of family friends changing in front of me on a trip to the beach. My face was inches away from his glorious, pink, dimpled ass. He was at least 10 years older than me, probably more. I'm still looking for that ass. That sort of "Young Adult" range 15-25 just does it for me. I aged through it and am older now and still... Although the top limit has stretched. So, younger is my thing. I do love slim to muscle too, but that can very easily be swayed by a brilliant smile and warm personality. :o)

For me, it's got to be one of my teacher's in middle school. It was difficult not to notice his buff and hairy body, and it didn't help that I was a star student. When we talked one on one, I had a hard time keeping my buddy down.

I find that I am attracted to a variety of types, and always have been, except maybe guys who are really effeminate (just a preference, no hate mail please), guys who are too obese and maybe guys over 70. I love hair, but it's not essential. Muscle bears are probably my favorite though. My first crushes were on high school jock types, however.

I started to notice that I was VERY attracted to bigger daddy type men when I was in my late 20's. I had just broken up with my ex of 10 years and I was tired of being with someone like him. I was always attracted to taller men, but bigger men really turned me on. After playing around with some bigger daddy type men in clubs etc. I realized that is where I needed to be. I've since that day been with Taller, bigger Daddy Guys. My partner now is a daddy. Yet I'm considering going it alone.

I would like to say that what I was attracted to (until I was like 25 or 26) was perhaps Media-Driven and programmed into me.. but when I Relate my likenesses TO FOOD (back then at 25 or 26) I would eat pizza with NOTHING on it..!!?? plain, and always.. sometimes with peperoni, but thats IT. -I Also wore cologne, & Drank alot of champaign, every day, couldnt get enough of the stuff... But NOW when I eat pizza I like ~Everything~ EVERYTHING!! on it please... and I DESPISE the smell of cologne, & I Hate champaign..

So Fast Forward 15 years, I am now 40. & I LOVE the smell and TASTE of the Beefiest, Manlieset, 50+ Brutish MEN on the market... Have your Way with me Big Daddy & Dont shower After Work typea thing!!!! LOL and I cant Get enough.... - but back then (when I was 25-26) I Dated a beautifull 24 year old woman, Voluptuous, and spellbinding.... & "I" was the Daddy...

At 2 Totally Different Times in My Life - I was totally emersed, AND VERY MUCH IN LOVE, with 2 Totally Different types of people.... So If there is an Answer to This ... I have None.
NO REGRETS, either way ;)

with me it was when I was a kid I was having sex with my Uncles, and watching my Father in the Shower room after playing Golf with his Buddies , and I was watching them Jerking each other off Once I asked my Father What They Were doing to each other he said they are just having fun together it's Ok , and even now looking at Tom of Finland , and the Marlboro Ads on the BillBoards the Great Looking Guys on their Horse me Wishing I was with them and me having fun around the camp fire in his bed roll with me that alway's gets me hard and jerking off even when I was young and Now alway's went after Silverdaddies, they know what they want , the younger guys would cum so fast and they would leave and I would still be Horny it like that Old Saying they Cum and Thank You Man and Leave you are still horny for more and you have to go out and find another 1 to get off, you just can't have one it's like potatoes chips , you can't just eat one ,you need more men to have fun with ,

This Bigguy's the angel whom I want there to catch me
when I finally do get to Heaven.

Dear Rob,

I was about 10 years old when I became aware that I was attracted to my brother, who was burly, very hairy, manly as could be, and always had skiddy marks in his underwear. I was also fascinated with his hairy toes. When I was in college I analyzed my own development and when obtaining a doctorate was in psychoanalysis and discussed considerably. I don't think we can determine the exact 'why' we have particular paraphilial structures but they just occur at the right time, the right place, and during all the very concisely fortuitous moments.

I had premonitions of this when I was about 4 when I was in the same bed with my brother who spent several nights in very bad winter weather in the country, not able to get back to the city proper. At that point, I discovered I loved to be protected and was 'wild' about his manly aromas, his hairy chest and his black carpeted hairy back! I really didn't realize altogether that much about his hairy torso, but always was in a stage of wonder why he had all that black hair curling out the front and back of his tee shirt. The fixation was all the stronger because I enjoyed the contrast of my smooth skin against his coarsley haired body. Important to my psychological structure was my fear that I would become hairy as well (which I didn't) and so the strength of this allure became stronger.

It was on this first cold winter night that I spooned up to him and enjoyed the feel of his black-haired ass cheeks showing from the open part of his jockstrap. The next morning I was in the bathroom while he showered and for some unknown reason sniffed his jock and became addicted to the smell and the appearance of his jockstrap and brown streaked briefs. Love is love, and I have always concluded that briefs and jocks, boots and athletic shoes join in the projected images of Madison Avenue that posted pictures of Calvin Klein briefs on Times Square, and fetish in the USA became public unashamed (as it should be) public property!

Hope I'm illuminating something; perhaps what you already know.

I find it funny how so many men ignore guys that aren't hairy. Believe it or not there are a lot of great guys who don't have a lot of hair or great big muscles. But there are masculine smooth men, so many miss a good times stuck on a trait that is really like only dating men with blue eyes. I have dated guys hairy, smooth, short, tall, even some very overweight. I found out way back when I first hit the gay scene that limiting myself was stupid, I was going to miss a lot of good times.
So maybe the next time a guy tries to approach you, let him you might be surprised to find out there are great men you have been ignoring.
I almost miss a great guy one night because he wasn't what I usually wanted, but luckily I went home with him, several times. I have wished so many times that I could find him again.
But he is lost in the mist of time.

good guys, god guys, i want one. i want one. goodlooking, kind and brilliant.