Cruising The Men's Room

March 14, 2012

Now that we have things like MISTER, cruising for sex in public places is starting to become a thing of the past. I came across this trailer for The Men's Room, a new short film premiering at the 2012 Atlanta Film Festival, and it's look like it'll be quite the hot topic, tackling everything from male sexuality to intimacy and the concept of public decency.

The Men's Room Trailer from Nature Show on Vimeo.

Here's a short synopsis of the film, directed by Jane Pickett:

When Thomas ventures into a park for a sexual encounter with a stranger, he uncovers a striking complexity composed of desire, fear, and betrayal when his would-be anonymous sex partner turns out to be a cop. The Men's Room explores the seemingly unwelcome yet enduring pastime of public sex, a world of secrecy and code lurking just below the surface of normalcy.

If you're in the Atlanta area, be sure to check out the film festival. The Men's Room will debut on Sunday, March 25th at the Landmark Midtown Art Cinema at 4pm. You can purchase tickets here.

Now let's get down to it, have you ever cruised a public place for sex? Do you think that with all the new location-based smart phone apps public cruising will no longer be needed?

Tags: Public Sex, Short Films, Atlanta Film Festival, Cruising, The Men's Room
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Post written by RobHeartsDH (View Author Profile)
About this author: Rob lives in Manhattan with his black pug Riley. When he’s not thinking about daddies, he enjoys writing, eating burritos, watching copious amounts of television, and thinking about his next meal.
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Men are hunters; it's programmed in us somehow, it's primal. Places like parks and restrooms,etc. will always attract some people because it's a bit like gambling or unwrapping a mystery gift; there is a thrill in the hunt and discovery. For purely aesthetic reasons I was not into restroom cruising when I was younger (sex with a clothespin on my nostrils didn't turn me on), but a great and glorious park bursting with the scent of life itself? If those trees could talk...

I totally agree with you, Men in general as you said like to hunt, it's Primal instinct and of course hormones.

Many men who engage in this kind of cruising do so because, despite their same-sex attraction, they have buckled under social pressure to get involved with women - whether girlfriends or wives. I don't have a problem with that.

What I *do* have a problem with is unsafe sex in unhygienic places. Might be 'sexy' to sneak a peek while standing at the urinals... but to actually engage in sex in a bathroom? Odiferous and filthy. *gag* And using a condom doesn't take *that* long...

Nope, won't find me *there* doing *that*. I connect sex with intimacy, and intimacy involves time for foreplay, creature comforts (like a bed!), and a scent nicer than stale piss.

I gotta say there is something hot about park sex, and T room sex. Its taboo, its naughty and even dangerous. When it doesn't work, its heart breaking, when it works it is a potent drug.

Some of the most intense sexual experiences I have ever had have been in Public restrooms and in parks - I have been on the down side of it as well being arrested is no fucking fun.

With the apps, more 'decent' people moving into areas where cruising was once hot and active, municipalities closing down T rooms, sex clubs and cleaning up parks and stepping up 'decency enforcement / quality of life enforcement' not to mention many people just moving on from that aspect of homosexuality (ironically, Straight couples screwing in public is more 'hot' now than gay sex these days.) since more and more Same sex couples are gaining acceptance and the right to be married, I do expect that such things will diminish. I do believe truckers will always be able to find a little action on the interstate. I don't believe "analog" cursing will completely die in smaller towns and rural areas, it may stay much the same as it always has, but in bigger metropolitan areas I believe there well be a noticeable decline. It won't however die completely. There are a LOT of guys " on the low" or that can't host and have no other options go get together. There are also a lot of pigs out there that like T rooms and the outdoors.

I for one actually miss the cruising days of my youth, and wish I were old enough to remember much wilder days. If only I had today's technology and the 1970's cruising ability, I just might be in heaven. - I say this as a New Yorker, with full knowledge that not every place was as open. it's just my personal fantasy.

Ah, the good ole days! I remember them well! Living in New York City, I cruised the Piers, the Trucks and the bathhouses. This was before I discovered the bars. While I was in college, I used to take mass transit. I'd hit as many of the subway men's room that I could find on my way home. Some were pure magic, while others were hell. Some of the men I met for sex later became my friends. I'd later lose them to AIDS. This included my partner of five years. Once the T rooms closed, I hit the bars. Now I don't as much as I used to. With sites like Daddy Hunt or Silver Daddy, it now just a click on my computer. I miss the rush of walking up to the T-room door and knowing someone who was the look out signaled those inside someone was approaching. You can't get that in a bar. There's a lot of things you can't get in a bar. All I have are the memories.

The cruising scene here in the UK is a bit different and for the last 20 years or so there's been a major crackdown on "public decency" after the heydays of the 70s and 80s. There remain very few public toilets at all and with the grown of remote-controlled CCTV patrols donlt need to be out in the cold to catch guys doing what comes naturally.

It's true though that straight sex in public (for an audience!) is significantly on the increase over here, a phenomenon known as "dogging" (look it up) which appears to affront public sensibilities much less.

The major advantage of apps and websites is the ability to know where and when to be places and know that someone will be there - it's no fun standing out in the cold wondering a park for hours only to find that the only person playing the eye game with you is the law enforcement officer who's been following you on CCTV. I've used various sites and apps with some success to meet guys from the closest university campus in the local park underneath the motorway bridge which runs alongside it, out of view of those who choose not to look...

But the days of random encounters in public restrooms are long gone in this country, not that I was ever much of a fan!

So have they stopped all the fun in Hampstead Heath? I never made it over there to enjoy it. too bad if that's true, semed a lot of fun.

Back in the "ole days" when I was young and a career soldier, bathrooms with glory holes were the only places I could engage. Yes, there was a risk, and I always scouted a place for a few days before venturing in to look for action. The military helped in that regard since they used to publish "Off Limits" lists which listed venues considered unfit for soldiers. Of course, that was a gold mine of information. I'm 72 now and am still turned on by porn flicks with glory hole scenes. Of course, none of those depictions are anything like the real thing but they serve a purpose. I do not engage in that sort of behavior anymore for a number of reasons: one of which is that they are far and few between in my area, and secondly, if there are any, the cops know about them with consequent "raids." The Internet is my means of communication for sex now. It's much, much safer and, with specific sites like DaddyHunt, we know exactly what our wants are....there's no guessing. Many years ago, I wrote a bit of doggeral concerning toilet sex. It starts: "I miss the days of toilet sex, the strangers through the walls. The tapping of feet, the showing of meat, and occasional glimpses of balls. Yes, those were the good ole days when sex was really fun. You came, you went; it was time well spent, and you left when you were done."

Man I so love that poem. And it is so true. No strings attached, just get each other off and leave. it was so simple back then. There's still some places like that around but they are few and far between. I think I'll always be prone to visit those places, unless I fall in love again!

Cruising is awesome! But I def think in many places it's a thing of the past (due to apps, general culture, etc). The thrill and newness and feeling of freedom is pretty powerful...and it's just fun.

It is a shame the way this and any similar films/shorts may effect us as a community, and it will make no mistake.

In my community exreme right wing prudery and and morality have all but crushed out "cruisin" altogether for our community.... This type of movie may feed that growing cancer of homophobic hatred into a ominous gigantic barrier for our community.

Hot Spots for Cruising have become a thing of the past as police and STR8 folks shut them all down under the guise of possible drug activity, because they cannot openly state it is to stop Gay Sex. Gay, married and bi men are afraid to go out to them for fear of being stopped and questioned by the cops, with female police being the most verbally abusive and out for blood, or at the very least having their vehicle licenses are recorded and put on a report.

Hunting/cruising in gym/fitness/health club locker rooms has become close to 99.5% non-existent as well with gays too scared to even just look at another man. Guys shower in underwear, change clothes and get dressed under towels, and a towel or underwear is required in male only saunas. Showers now have curtains and/or cubicles, with open multiple showerhead communal areas almost a thing of the past. Open nudity in the men's locker rooms is almost taboo..... Most men using a locker room these days change like their ass is on fire and do NOT shower or wash up at the gym at all.

As for hunting on line... it has it's flaws too.... the infamous GAMEPLAYERS!
A) Who are on-line and talk and NEVER show up for hook-ups they make on-line.
B) Who waste genuine men's time by chatting them up just to j/o and disappear after they cum.
C) Who NEVER take NO for an answer....
D) Who if they cannot make an agreed date NEVER tell the other party they cannot make it.
E) Who give false descriptions, information and pictures....
F) is the guy on the other end REAL or out to hunt faggots for fun? or kids playing games?

Atleast in the past you knew if a guy was in the park, T-room or where ever his need was as genuine and real as yours not a game and he was there.

SO TRUE! I am so tired of Craigslist or the online hookup sites where half the guys are liars or just toying with you. I hooked up once with this bottom boy in a video store, and he kept contacting me after that to have a repeat, but then he never showed up at the places he arranged. He even had me come to his apt. but did not give me the code to get into the bldg. Another guy went in and I followed, then went and knocked on his apt. door (Yes he gave me that!). No answer, even when I called his number and texted him. Nothing! He had done that too many times, and I blocked him from contacting me after that. I think he must have had a serious drug problem or something. I just go to a cruisy video store or a gloryhole place and try my luck if anyone shows and wants to play with me, a lot simpler and less stressful!

I agree with everything said. I miss the public sex its all way to risky now, only thing I still see, but few and far between is seeing truckers carry on. That said the apps are so unreliable as to how close people really are. For me its just cheap thrills of talk and trading pics. Even the little thrill of seeing another car or truck on the road with a gay flag seems to be dying out, when you do come across them its usually a girl :(

This may seem a dumb question, but can someone explain how you have sex in a bathroom when you are both in different stalls (unless there's a glory hole, of course). I have heard about the signals and foot-tapping, etc. But then what? Does one person go into the other person's stall? It's hard to picture and I've never figured it out.

Your question isn't dumb, so I'll try to explain using my experience. First, you had to becareful in a bathroom. Some stalls had a door. Many did not. If a person entered, you made eye contact, waited a bit, then the person who entered would step out of the stall, usually holding his manhood for you to see. Then you'd both do what needed to be done, and hopefully without someone walking in to interrupt. If the stall had a door then there's a chance it had a glory hole. If you're both sitting, you'd glance at each other's shoe, waiting for a signal, either tapping the floor or tapping the sides of each other's show. Then you'd both glance through the hole to get a look. Or you'd stand at the urinal, wiggling your manhood, hoping the person standing a few urinals away would become interested. So there you have it.

Thanks. I SORT of get it. Am surprised stalls didn't have doors. Never encountered that. Do you mean that the person who entered (the bathroom?) would step OUT of a stall? Or did he step INTO a stall. I can understand someone entering, making eye contact and both of you stepping into a stall. Is that what you mean? I must be dense, but the logistics still don't add up!

i can tell you from my experience that unless there was a gloryhole, one guy (the suckee) got on his knees and shoved his hard cock under the stall. The other one got down and sucked it like that. if it was safe, then they may get into the same stall or go out to the urinals. But a lot of times they wanted to remain anonymous so he sucked him off under the stall. In most places there's plenty of room under the stall to get your cock, balls, etc. under it for fun. Of course you hoped that the floor was moderately clean if you did that. Over at the university I've sucked a lot of hot college cock under the stall, even as recently as last month. I'll put a good pic of that on here if I can.

There is NO cyber "substitute" for meeting and experiencing other men in person, whether in a bar or in a park or other cruise areas. There may indeed be risks involved, but the payoff is infinitely more satisfying than phone sex or Mutual masturbation via CAM! The culture of gay bars and other meeting places is dying in large part due to the lack of desire,interest, whatever, of gay men to go out and actually socialize - rather than stay chained to their computers and cams to seek internet sublimartions for a real erotic encounter.
Now don't get me wrong - I have met some great guys who have, in time, become good friends and/or "friends with benefits" via various internet sites. So the Net is a great tool for facilitating meetings of like-minded men. But it amazes me that guys will trade the pleasure of truly socializing, flirting, connecting in person for the truly meaningless "connections" online.
And, hey guys, when you Do find yourslef at a gay establushment - how about NOT spending the majority of your time there NOT on your moblile device and look up once in a while to see who might be trying to get your attention and is showing some interest in you. You might get a more than pleasant surprise! <G.

I have memories of the old days going way back to the 1960s ... park and t-room cruising that was totally unbelievable now that I think back to it. The risk was definitely part of its appeal. I grew up in San Francisco, so the possibilities were endless. I have vivid memories of nights in Lafayette Park (Sacramento/Laguna Streets) that were a porn movie but REAL. 20 or 30 dudes among the bushes and trees .. all cut back now, of course.

When the bars closed at 2 a.m., on weekend nights the guys would head for the park and show hard leaning against a tree. Orgies in the clearing within a cluster of trees .. OMG it was HOT. Every couple of hours the cops would drive through the park and shine their lights around, supposedly looking for guys doing what they shouldn't. But I actually never saw anyone arrested there .. I think they just wanted to establish their presence for safety reasons.

T-rooms at colleges and universities, in particular, were wild .. UC Berkeley, SF State, Stanford .. all had notorious t-rooms with known glory holes and lots of traffic. Raids and shut-downs from time to time, but there was always action to be had.

All that said, without the Internet, that's all we had besides smoke-filled bars that were awful in most respects at least in my opinion. Are things better today? Yes, I think they are .. the convenience of online cruising is wonderful and it's much safer if you go about it in the right way.

But NOTHING will ever take away my memories of those days ... the baths in the 70's .. the disco beat with cocks throbbing to the rhythm ... HOT HOT HOT .. and then came the 80's with the AIDS scourge and the music stopped ...

Now in the current century I wonder what will develop next ... smart phones can do a lot but they can't suck cock ... LOL

I used to be a BIG restroom troll, I love the hunt, the risk of being caught and I was caught twice by the cops. Both times I experienced such a rush that I likened it to an orgasm, but without the actual act of cumming.
The idea of going to a restroom and getting cruised is such a big thrill, it is a big ego boost. We all desire to feel some connection to other men, we want to find love, but sometimes love isn't possible with men in a restroom.
Most restrooms I frequented had either a large gloryhole or a small peep hole. Either way it made my conquests all that much more thrilling when I'd discover another gay male experiencing the same rush of exhilaration when they discovered they were into risky sex.
Do I want to experience that again? No, but only because I'm trying to develop a masturbation group in my area. A place free from being raided, a place were all men can come together and share their sexuality in safety. It's going to take time, but in the end it will be better for the next generation of gay men!

I used to do the "Toilet Tango" back in the 90's when I was in my twenties. Usually it was in shopping malls but the most fun was in the Philly airport. I was surprised just how crazy horny pilots, male flight attendants, janitors and businessmen could be! But looking back now, I don't know how I was actually able get away with doing that stuff; but I did. It was fun then but never again!

So I know one guy who lives in this region who goes around making new gloryholes when he can. More power to him! I know the authorities keep closing up GHs and he keeps making them, and the gloryhole is a lot better (and cleaner usually) then shoving your cock under a stall partition. There used to be several in my town, but they have almost all been closed up by moralists and health authorities. I wish I lived in a place where they still had some fun ones, like SF or Fort Worth.

I, too, remember the old days of t-rooms and public parks and miss 'em from time to time. There's something about the immediacy and the raw testosterone that's pretty damn exciting. But I can't find these places any more. How do you find 'em these days?

Sex in public areas is a risky thing where guys drink and then anything goes until they wake up with a headache. Such activity was more common when there was less knowledge about what it can lead to.

my good friend and I used to go to restrooms and "rub dicks" with each other when we were in the sixth grade. it felt so good and was pre spunk so no mess. We went to park mens rooms and the school restroom and one day we did it by a tree by his house - that produced my first cum - I like to go to bath houses to get annomyus sex now, it's not that easy to get a willing partner some days, but others it's absolutly wonderfull and almost always a great show. Long live gay bath houses.

I like the line: "why are u here..?" ANS: "I don't know" REPLY "You wouldn't be here if you didn't know" Damn!! That's such a classic line from my own past--how many young confused horny guys had this happen to them in the mens room? (My hand is up! :-)